Dear Softball,
What an absolutely crazy story you and I have written so far together, yeah? This chapter is an especially emotional one, and one that I am trusting will make so much more sense later. For now though, I thought it would be appropriate to remind you what you mean to me ...or maybe to remind me how indebted I am to you. Either way, softball, here goes nothing.
Our narrative begins in 2003 with an awkwardly chubby and too tall to fit in five-year-old blonde girl whose parents let her play on a co-ed tee-ball team called the Cardinals. Maybe this was a tactic to let her burn off some steam, get her out of the house or let her meet new people, but regardless, her life would be forever changed.
Flash forward to 2006, the blonde girl is STILL awkward and STILL chubby, but has a new sense of boldness. This boldness is just enough for her to raise her hand in front of her coach-pitch team when the coach (her dad!) asked who was interested in learning to pitch. Someone needed to be able to throw a ball underhand at the 10u level, so why not her? This is really where I began to fall in love with you, softball, and I didn't even realize it.
From the beginnings of the Pink Panthers, where my hot pink socks complemented the pink linings of my Jennie Finch cleats and matching glove, I found something in you that I adored. Not without struggle though, softball, because there have been plenty of tears, anger and frustrations that you have led me to and through. It's funny to think back now about the screaming matches that dad and I had revolving around you. I didn't see the value of sacrifice at 11 years old when I wanted to spend my summers in the sun with my friends instead of at the makeshift pitching lane we had in the backyard.
Mom had to play "referee" most of the time as Connor, Kyle and Cole looked on. This phase (thankfully) didn't last long though, as soon enough, dad and I were at practices hours in advance so that we could finish our pitching workouts before the team arrived. Dad's rule of "last pitch, best pitch" sometimes took an extra 20 minutes, but he never let me off the hook without showing my absolute best. He believed in me, softball, and he believed in us.
Of the teams of my youth that I have been fortunate enough to pitch for, one sticks out more than most - Ohio Extreme. The people within, Kurt Jackson and Ron Rex, organically reiterated my desire to be a part of your world, softball. And for that, we owe them the world.
Present day, being an Auburn Tiger is a dream that I never knew I had. Beyond sports, I cannot imagine the kind of person that I would be without the people that have infiltrated my life. Coaches, GAs, ATs, sports psychologists, and of course, teammates - it truly takes a village! Many of these people have graciously invested so much of themselves in me, demonstrating a face of Christ that I would've never seen without your lead. Teammates who know the crevices of my heart, have loved me when I couldn't buy a strike and who have continuously redefined sisterhood are the ones I am most thankful for and ones I wouldn't have if it wasn't for you.
Fourteen years of pitching have passed in what seems like a blink of an eye, and this hiatus is BIZARRE. I wish I was being yelled at by coach. (Yes, even seeing him throw the pitch-call card would be therapeutic right now). I wish I heard JP's sarcastic remarks from across the diamond. I wish Ash and I were on our way to Auburn Nutrition. I wish Rachel was rambling about "Casheyboy" (her dog). I wish 'Lyss was making Wellness sushi night mandatory for everyone within her voice. I wish Tan was waiting for our "code words" before starting the first inning. I wish Britt was screeching after the eagle "K". Heck, I wish I was setting my morning alarm for 5 a.m. for a Watson lift with PK.
I would not be the fearless, bold and faithful woman that I am without you, softball. You are not who I am whatsoever, but you are a part of every single fiber that makes me up. I cannot wait to be reunited with you and to see what's left in our story.
My family. My home. 🤍 pic.twitter.com/6rCcOFNN85
— lexie (@LexieHandley) March 13, 2020
Thank you Jesus.
Thank you Auburn.
Thank you softball.
-#27, Lexie Handley